Swinging involves ethically non-monogamous couples swapping partners for sexual pleasures. While the majority of swingers are heterosexual, there is also a vibrant bisexual community within the lifestyle. For bi-curious couples exploring their bi side through swinging, strong communication and respect are key to success.
If you’re looking to explore this interest more in the lifestyle, here’s some tips on navigating bisexuality as a swinger.
Defining Your Comfort Level
Couples interested in bisexual exploration should have in-depth conversations with their partner about comfort levels. What specific acts does each partner enthusiastically consent to? This helps avoid awkward situations or boundary violations down the road. Be as detailed as possible rather than relying on assumptions. Fantasies discussed in the abstract can feel quite different when faced with real-life partners.
Start Slowly and Work Up
It’s perfectly normal to feel some performance anxiety your first time playing with a new gender. Couples new to bisexual swinging should start slow and ease into things at a comfortable pace. Attend some meet-and-greets or erotic parties first. Soft swap sessions allow you to slowly ramp up experience with lower pressure. Taking things slowly helps couples overcome jitters and build confidence.
Set Group Ground Rules
Swinging sessions involving bisexual play require clear ground rules that all participants understand. This includes respecting both verbal and nonverbal cues to slow down or stop. Respecting each person’s boundaries is essential to having an ethical experience.
Manage Jealousy and Insecurities
Swinging amplifies insecurities people may feel about their age, body, performance, etc. Managing jealousy and resentment is crucial for successfully swinging as a couple. Never force an uncomfortable partner into bisexual play. Work through issues beforehand, offer reassurance during, and check-in with each other after. It often helps to start with less intimidating partners your first few times.
Accommodate Both Partners’ Needs
Mismatched comfort levels for bisexual play can breed resentment over time. If one partner only wants to watch girl-on-girl scenes while the other wants to fully play, friction may arise. Have honest conversations about both partners’ needs outside the bedroom. Be prepared to compromise rather than dragging an unwilling partner along.
Respect Orientation Identities
Every person involved in bisexual swinging has a right to their own sexual identity. Don’t assume solo female swingers are there as your “third.” They may be queer or lesbian rather than bisexual. Respect each individual’s orientation and don’t pressure others into acts they don’t want. Swinging works best when bisexual couples treat single swingers as whole people, not merely fantasy fodder.
Separate Emotional and Physical Intimacy
Developing feelings for swing partners is a risky road that may upset your primary relationship. Many couples in the lifestyle keep emotional intimacy exclusive to their marriage. The physical pleasure with swing partners is kept recreational. If you find yourself getting emotionally attached, it may be wise to scale back the bisexual play.
Set Aside Quality Time After
Scheduling dedicated couples time after swinging can help ease emotional aftermath like jealousy. Debrief your experience honestly and carefully. Provide lots of verbal reassurance and affection. Sometimes reconnecting one-on-one first before discussing another group session helps stabilize the primary relationship.
Swinging is meant to enrich an already healthy relationship, not complete it. Couples need a strong foundation of trust, communication and security. Defining boundaries and accommodating both partners’ needs helps reduce friction around bisexual play. With understanding and empathy, you can navigate these new waters together successfully.
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