As you probably know, swinging is all about having a variety of sexual experiences with people other than your significant other. In most cases, couples meet other like minded couples or singles for merely sexual pleasure. The basis of these get-together is that there are no strings attached even if you both choose to repeat the experience over again.
Since many of us enjoy companionship with our sex partners outside of the bedroom, it’s natural to want to hang out with them for non-sexual activities. You may work to establish a friendship that lasts for years. However, most swinging relationships do come to an end at some point.
There’s no doubt that adding friendship to sex can make things a little uncomfortable and the primary reason why dating doesn’t work out for swingers is due to their preferences. At their nature, swinger couples enjoy variety. After a while, the couple you’re seeing loses interest. The excitement of this lifestyle comes from trying new people and having new firsts again. It’s certainly possible to recreate that excitement in later encounters, but don’t be surprised if it goes away. The best thing to do is take your time.
Some couples who are looking to establish a working relationship with another couple have suggested polyamory, but swingers aren’t really interested in that option. While it’s great to have friendships, it’s not a good idea for that friendship to be built on a foundation of sex. It’s better to avoid letting feelings get in the way, but it happens all the time.
When you decide to break up, it’s going to be hard to take this step. You’ll probably be worried about hurting other people’s feelings and there is a certain amount of tension associated with that relationship. It may help to think of this as regular dating. You can feel the tension build up inevitably. Personality clashes over time, so make sure to discuss your feeling with your partner and decide upon a mutual agreement that will fit you needs. If that includes breaking up with the couple, then that is what must be done.
When you finally make the decision to break up, contact the couple and let them know that you’d like to take some time to discuss your relationship. You can do this right away, but it may be better to schedule a time to talk. Once you have their attention, avoid the urge to sugarcoat what you’re trying to say. They’ll probably figure out what you’re trying to say anyways. Break the news to them gently and try to remain friendly. After all, the swinging community is a small group. You’re fairly likely to run into them at some point down the road. Don’t be surprised if the couple holds similar feelings and weren’t sure how to bring them up. However, if you do find that they don’t feel the same way, try to be as considerate as possible.
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